I want to steal the 5 Seconds of Summer mystery song dice

Stealing is bad, but so is me not being in possession of a giant blow up dice that includes the songs Voodoo Doll and Wrapped Around Your Finger.

I figured after the success of the mystery songs included in the setlist for Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour, more artists would begin to do their own spin on it. I think it’s an easy way to get a little extra promotion for upcoming shows. Taylor Swift fans have dedicated whole accounts into tracking the mystery songs and I have even heard about the possibility of bets being made as to what the songs will be that night of tour.

Did I think that 5SoS would be the first(to my knowledge) artists to follow in Taylor’s bejeweled footsteps? No but I really shouldn't be shocked. The big dice is an interesting choice however. It’s large enough to be just this side of impractical but it allows audience participation which is fun. Honestly I’m shocked Ashton Irwin didn’t shoot for an insanely large Wheel of Fortune style randomizer wheel. The memes make themselves with that one.

But the audience participation part is the important bit, because this give me the ability to steal the gigantic dice and smuggle it back to California like packrat weasel I am.

I am going to the Dallas show which is actually in Irving but apparently thats Dallas??? I don’t know I live in California do not ask me questions about Texas it’s not allowed. I’m going to the Dallas show versus the Los Angeles or Phoenix, AZ shows because that weekend I will be in West Virginia for the Mothman Festival because my job makes no sense and I am a crazy person. I also bought what I think is a VIP tickets as I enjoyed my experience from their last tour at their Palladium show. I say “what I think is VIP” because this ticket roll out was about as smooth as improperly mixed pavement so I truly am not sure what I bought but I am still flying halfway across the country to watch these goobers perform because I am a slave to teenage me’s desires now that I have adult money.

Adult me? I want that dice.

Here is my plan: I think I have a balcony seat? At least thats what I think I got. So I will need to go down to GA to have access to the cube for the spin. I need to position myself so I can still be included in the dice roll but I am far enough to the back so Michael Clifford can’t leap into the crowd to karate chop me for attempted theft of the dice. I have thought of all possibly responses to my scheme, and this version and one where fans think Calum Hood will love them if they thwart me are the most likely.

I would like to achieve possession of the dice without popping it. One: I do not want to incite panic that popping a giant dice in a concert venue would cause. Two: the whole reason I want it is it’s a giant dice. It’s useless if I take away it’s ability to be a dice. Sure I could patch it but thats plan B I want plan A.

So my only option once I have my hands on the dice? Run like hell. Will I be able to fit it through the door? Probably not but how funny would it be if I had a Loony Toons style flop down trying to force it through the doorway?

I also have the question of how I get it back to California, but that is a question for after I have the song cube in my possession. 

See you in Dallas!